How to deal with loneliness: A step-by-step guide

Loneliness can hit at any time and at any stage in life, whether it’s during quiet moments at home, school or work, or even during social situations when you’re surrounded by people. Loneliness can make you feel disconnected from the world around you, and for some people, financial stress, like dealing with debt, can make loneliness feel even heavier.

People can experience loneliness in different, personal ways. Three examples include: 

1. Social loneliness, or having no friends to meet up with or share hobbies with.

2. Existential loneliness, or feeling alone even in social situations and being surrounded by others.

3. Emotional loneliness, or feeling detached from someone you’re close with, like a partner or family member.

Sometimes, there’s not one clear cause of loneliness, and it can be just how we’re feeling at a certain stage of life. At other times, loneliness can be caused by different reasons, not just by being physically alone. Loneliness can crop up if we feel disconnected from others or don’t have the physical, emotional or social support we need. 

Major life events or changes, like moving to university, experiencing a break-up, being diagnosed with a physical or mental health condition, becoming a parent, becoming a carer for a family member, or losing a loved one can cause loneliness.

Seasonal events can also heighten the feelings of loneliness, such as at Christmas, birthdays or other holidays and celebrations. 

As well as these causes, someone might be more likely to feel lonely if they’re struggling financially. Debt can create barriers to socialising, and the pressure of money problems can make people withdraw from society.

According to our latest client report: 

Volunteering is a great way to deal with loneliness because it shifts your focus to helping a cause you care about. You can connect with others with a shared purpose, giving a sense of belonging and helping you to make friends, too. The great part about volunteering is that you don’t have the pressure of committing to a job contact, and can help out whenever works for you.

To help you manage loneliness, intentionally choose to volunteer in places where you’ll likely be interacting with others, such as helping at a local charity shop, assisting with community events or supporting an animal shelter.

When things feel a bit heavy and lonely, sometimes the best comfort isn’t in a busy place, but in the quiet all around us. God’s creation – the parks, the trees, even the sky above your local area – can be a real source of peace and a gentle reminder that we’re part of something bigger. Spending time in nature can lift our spirits and help us reconnect with our emotions.

Churches are more than Sunday services – they’re communities. Many offer warm spaces, toddler groups, coffee mornings and a chance to find friendship and prayer when you’re struggling. You don’t even have to be a Christian to get support from them.

Glenn, Pastor at Wyke Christian Community Church, Bradford, shares how his church is actively reaching out to people in the community: 

Why not see if you can connect with your local church today? You could look online and see if your local church has any updates, or simply walk in and ask them. 

If loneliness is impacting your life, reach out to someone you trust, such as a friend, family member, colleague or teacher. You can also contact your local GP who can listen to your worries and refer you for talking therapies too. If you’d prefer, you could see if you’re able to make a self referral depending on the area you live in.

One way to tackle loneliness is to connect with others who share your interests. Think about your hobbies – whether it’s hiking, reading, painting, board games, quiz nights or a specific type of music. Chances are, there are local groups dedicated to these things! Joining groups can give you common ground for conversation and connection. You’ll meet like-minded people and enjoy the same activities, making it easier to make genuine friendships.

Writing down how you’re feeling can help you spot patterns and be kind to yourself on tough days. It’s okay to feel lonely, and noticing when those feelings crop up is the first step to getting support.

Since COVID-19, many of us now work from home, or work a hybrid role. Working from home can have its perks (like an extra lie-in in the mornings!) but some people might find that working remotely can make them feel isolated. 

If debt feels heavy and you’re sitting alone with it, reaching out for free, expert help can make a real difference. Sometimes, the worry of money problems can amplify feelings of loneliness. Getting debt advice isn’t just about money, it’s about connecting with someone who understands and cares. At CAP and your local church, our friendly teams offer debt help and a listening ear, without judgment. Taking that step can be a lifeline for your finances and your wellbeing. You don’t have to face it alone.

If you need free debt help, please get in touch today and find your local CAP centre near you below: